If ugly things make you vomit, you may want to not look at the rest of this post. If you’ve arrived here from the Guardian ‘Joy of six’ article, I want to say a big thanks to BigNewPrinz for putting up the link (check the record, check the record, check the guy’s track record). Nice one fella! By the way, if Barry Glenndenning makes his way here, I’m in the process of sending you some albums by The Fall, as you hinted that you needed to get into the band on a podcast last season. Anyway, on to business…
We’ll begin with the mighty, majestic, in these cases ill-advised Glasgow Celtic:
Away kit – Season 1991-92
Perhaps the most ill-conceived away kit of all time (although I recall Man City in something similar), the ‘Peoples‘ shirt, as worn by Celtic in 1991-92 was a particular abomination. Horrid. Why? How?
The geometric 3rd kit – Season 1994-95
Initially released as the third kit, Umbro’s experiment in geometry seemed to get an awful lot of playing time.
Away kit – Season 1995-96
The bumblebee top adhered to the awful trend for flourescent away tops that plagued the mid to late ’90s (did Chelsea really have an orange and silver kit or is that just a recurring nightmare), giving Celtic the appearance of a bunch of glow-in-the-dark wasps.
Now we’ll move on to those buggers in blue, the disgraceful Glasgow Rangers:
Goalkeeper kit – Seasons 1994-96
Around the time of World Cup 1994, when England’s David seaman was so appalled by the England kit that he claimed it was affecting his performance, Adidas had clearly forgotten how to make nice looking goalkeeper tops, i.e. plain green all over, going for a bizarre array of slashes and diagonal patterns. Big Andy Goram’s personal nightmare… it was used for two whole years.
Away kit – Season 1994-95
Not a good kit season for either half of the old firm, even though Rangers claimed title #7 in a row (sponsor McCewan also had their name on the Blackburn kit in England for their own double). This cheeky red and black pinstripe number caused all kinds of problems, for example, while running it created a stroboscopic effect like staring at stereogram image.
Away kit- Season 2002-03
The controversial ‘orange‘ kit worn by Rangers as their third top for the season raised a few eyebrows, but more importantly singed a few eyeballs.
Here are some alternative shockers.